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" I cannot take anymore anal sex"

My husband loves anal sex and I resisted it for a long time as I found the idea repulsive. However, lately we have been practicing anal sex and I hate it. I think it is disgusting and painful and I feel really dirty. The only reason I am doing it is because I want to satisfy him so he doesn’t go off and leave me for someone else. If he leaves me I would get over it in time but I won’t be able to manage the bills on my own and we have a young child.
Kate from Durham

The best way to make anal sex more enjoyable is to have lots of foreplay beforehand and to use a good lubricant. This will make anal sex more comfortable and less painful. You could try a different position where you could lie in the missionary position as opposed to the doggy style position as he penetrates you, it could be that the position is not very comfortable. Meanwhile your partner could caress your breast and kiss you while performing anal sex.If you are still uncomfortable with practicing anal sex then you will just have to tell him that you do not like it and hopefully he will stop. If he loves and respects you then he won’t make you do anything that you are not happy with. Some guys actually have affairs because they are getting what they want and it no longer becomes a fantasy.If he does leave you then it would be better in the long run to be apart from him than to be there for you as you have a child together because if you are not happy together then the child will sense this and have an unhappy childhood.
 




I have fallen for my best friend’s ex,

I have a crush on my best friend’s ex. I have known him for 2 years and we get along really well. We have more in common together than he did with his ex girlfriend and we are good friends.. Lately we have been flirting a lot with each other since his ex left him and moved to London to start university. He told me that he has strong feelings for me but I do not know what to do because if I start to have a relationship with him then I would have to keep it a secret because I would feel degraded by going off with my friend’s ex- boyfriend especially as I still keep in touch with her. I do not want to lose her as a friend and if my other girl friends find out that I am going out with my friends ex then they won’t respect me because I will get a bad reputation and they won’t want to know me in case they think I am going to go off with their boyfriends.

Charlotte from Cardiff

I think you should follow your heart and go for it with this guy. Your friend probably won’t mind as they are no longer together. If she has a problem then she shouldn’t have left him in the first place. The fact that she has moved a way is no excuse for ending the relationship as many people happily have long distance relationships. As for your friends, if they are your true friends then they should be happy for you. They shouldn’t have a problem either as your friend is not together with him anymore so it is not like you are trying to break up the relationship. You shouldn’t care too much about what other people think as it is your life and your happiness at the end of the day. However don’t rush into anything as he may be on the rebound so take it slowly to avoid getting hurt.
 



I am scared my boyfriend’s mates have seen me naked

My boyfriend took some naked pictures of me a while ago. The other day one of his friends said that he showed him the naked pictures and I feel mortified. My boyfriend denied it and said that they were just trying to wind me up. I do not know what to do as I feel like I cannot trust him anymore.

Sarah from Lancaster

It is common for couples to take naked pictures of their partners so maybe his friends are simply just trying to wind you up. The best thing to do would be to laugh it off. His friends will soon get bored if you don’t get wound up. They may also be doing it to cause tension between you and your fella as they may want a piece of you and could be jealous of your relationship so they could be trying to stir things up so that you have an argument and break up, so just ignore it.At the end of the day your boyfriend has the right to remain innocent until proven guilty so you don’t want to jeapordise your relationship. You need to trust your boyfriend or else the relationship won’t work. If however you do come across the evidence that your boyfriend has shown his friends the naked pictures of you and you object to that then you should leave him especially if he has abused your trust.
 

 



"My mum is expecting but I hate the father"

I am an 18 year old girl with two younger sisters but they have different fathers and none of us are allowed to see them anymore because my mother can never settle with one man.


My father is a loser and has let us down regularly. When he didn’t show up the last time my mother wrote to him to tell him not to bother anymore. That happened 2 years ago and I haven’t seen him since. My younger sister’s father was beating my mum up and she made him leave last year.She now has a new man she met in the pub and she is 33 but he is only 25. They met 2 months ago and he doesn’t have a job he just stays at home drinking and smoking weed. He is always checking me out and I feel really uncomfortable.Now she has asked him to move in with us at the end of the month because she is pregnant. I am worried she will never meet the right guy as she picks the wrong ones. I don’t want him to move in as he will make our lives hell like the others did.I have told her I am not happy with him moving in but she won’t listen. We are at each others throat arguing about it and I have to go to my friend’s house to calm down. I just wish she would listen to me but I cannot get through to her and I don’t know what else to do. Although I am 18 I don’t want to move out because I don’t want to leave my sisters in the mess.

Stacey from Liverpool

Ok the men in your life have all been a disappointment for you and your family and you don’t want to go through all that hassle again.I am sure your instincts are right if he is making you feel uncomfortable. You all need time to get to know him better before he is allowed to move in. You need to find a moment when you are relaxed when your mum is alone so you can explain to her how this new man makes you feel.She needs to know how anxious you are about her rushing into things because you are scared she will get hurt again. You need to suggest that she takes things slowly with her new man before she agrees to him moving in.They say bad luck comes in threes and she seems to have been strong enough to walk away from men who have treated her badly in the past so this is probably just a phase during the honeymoon period. I am sure that it won’t take long for her to realise that this guy is a loser and she will have the strength to get rid of him

 

 


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